Monday, October 17, 2016
Halloween
There," said my Dad, as he handed me our jack-o-lantern. "Just set it on the porch." ... It was the night before Halloween and it was very quite on our street there was nobody anywhere and that was unusual because our street was always very lively but tonight it was different. As I was walking out I heard a big crash across the street and as goosebumps started to fill my arms my curiosity go the best of me and and went to go check what had happen so as I was crossing the street I heard another big crash this time it was down the street so again my curiosity go the best of me and even though I knew I should go back inside I didn't. So I hoped on my skate board and zoomed down the street to check and so I finally got to the sight and you wouldn't believe what I saw! There was a gigantic spaceship hovering over the street and I got so scared I hoped on my skateboard and attempted to get back home but that's when it all went down a big blue beam came down from the UFO and I started floating up into the spaceship, and once I got abducted into the UFO there was the scariest creature staring down at me all I know is that it was not alien at all. Know I am a slave for this misterous creature. Know you guys back at home now what happened to me on this night. Dad I'm so scared if your reading this please send help!
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I think this was a good story, and I like the sort-of cliffhanger at the end, but there were lots of spelling mistakes, so that would be one thing you could do better.
ReplyDeleteI liked your story! But a lot of your sentences aren't really put together well. You need more comas and periods. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteI thought your story was funny and I finally know why you have been gone. The only thing you could change is what everyone else has been saying, just a few spelling mistakes.
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